She, was like a heart that stopped beating on the day I left our doorstep to go to war.
She wrote me love letters that kept me warm when I was freezing in the rain.
I took a gunshot to the leg and ended up lying in a hospital bed.
But the horrors I had seen were a plague on my eyes, and I didn't know to get them out of my head.
She said,
Home is where the heart and I need you here now because I miss you.
It's been two long years since your smile brightened my day.
Come home to me.
On the day I returned home, I was merely a ghost of myself.
She knew it, and I knew it and she knew I needed help
So she held me.
And I cried so many tears that i soaked my shirt and then I went to bed.
Then I woke up at 4am, just wishing I were dead.
I left something behind, something inside of me. Hell, if I can remember it's name.
I took the revolver to my forehead, I was just going to stop the pain.
One minute I was close to death
The next minute so far away
She grabbed the gun emptied the chamber, and threw it all away.
I could never thank her enough.
Goddamn These Walls
There are memories of you if there are memories of anything
There are stories to be told that won't fit the concept of this piece
The beauty that we birthed in these goddamn walls
Could fill the Louvre to the brim with our masterpieces
And don't say you never felt it, because I know in fact you did
I see the glint inside your eyelid when we speak as though we're kids
But we're still kids and there's still love
And we can be that again, hell we still are
But these goddamn walls are holding me in like bars
You escaped from the prison through a hole carved with a spoon
You could slip into the cracks, but I'm not small enough to fit through
We need a new home.
This place isn't home for me anymore
I hope yours isn't either
Because if it is that means you've settled, and I've already lost the war.
If I knew the steps I had to take
The smile that it would make would be concrete evidence to the fact
That there is love here, and here is my heart
It's not this apartment or the bedroom, or the fucking bathroom floor
We had a child here, as a scared couple needing a place to live.
Not a place that we're going to eventually call our own
Eventually title it our home
A temporary band-aid on the problem of homelessness.
Because we we're bringing a child to this world, and he needed a roof atop his head.
And as I lay here on the floor, elbows ground red from the carpet
I wonder to myself, just how I could have stopped it
How to stop the gentle distancing that at night leaves my heart reeling
How to get so close to touch your skin, without hurting certain feelings.
How do I let you know,
that every day I wake up to an empty bed (just like you do)
and I remember that once you were there, and even if you were sleeping
I loved the look upon your face, hell I just loved your face and
I loved the way you snuggled, and it sounds so damn cliche
But I just love your skin, and the way I can run my fingers down it slowly
And I don't need anyone, anywhere to tell me how I feel about you
This will never be more real than it is here. Minutes away but miles apart
and I'm rambling now because there's so many things that I want to say and this would sound disgusting
if it happened face to face
I'd make a wreck of trying to explain this, and I wouldn't use the proper words
and you wouldn't hear my meaning, because I'd stutter on myself.
But fuck.
I love you.
There are stories to be told that won't fit the concept of this piece
The beauty that we birthed in these goddamn walls
Could fill the Louvre to the brim with our masterpieces
And don't say you never felt it, because I know in fact you did
I see the glint inside your eyelid when we speak as though we're kids
But we're still kids and there's still love
And we can be that again, hell we still are
But these goddamn walls are holding me in like bars
You escaped from the prison through a hole carved with a spoon
You could slip into the cracks, but I'm not small enough to fit through
We need a new home.
This place isn't home for me anymore
I hope yours isn't either
Because if it is that means you've settled, and I've already lost the war.
If I knew the steps I had to take
The smile that it would make would be concrete evidence to the fact
That there is love here, and here is my heart
It's not this apartment or the bedroom, or the fucking bathroom floor
We had a child here, as a scared couple needing a place to live.
Not a place that we're going to eventually call our own
Eventually title it our home
A temporary band-aid on the problem of homelessness.
Because we we're bringing a child to this world, and he needed a roof atop his head.
And as I lay here on the floor, elbows ground red from the carpet
I wonder to myself, just how I could have stopped it
How to stop the gentle distancing that at night leaves my heart reeling
How to get so close to touch your skin, without hurting certain feelings.
How do I let you know,
that every day I wake up to an empty bed (just like you do)
and I remember that once you were there, and even if you were sleeping
I loved the look upon your face, hell I just loved your face and
I loved the way you snuggled, and it sounds so damn cliche
But I just love your skin, and the way I can run my fingers down it slowly
And I don't need anyone, anywhere to tell me how I feel about you
This will never be more real than it is here. Minutes away but miles apart
and I'm rambling now because there's so many things that I want to say and this would sound disgusting
if it happened face to face
I'd make a wreck of trying to explain this, and I wouldn't use the proper words
and you wouldn't hear my meaning, because I'd stutter on myself.
But fuck.
I love you.
Wings Ripped From A Black Swan
Her wind is a boundless butterfly flapping its designer wings
To call her beauty simply magnificent would be an understated truth at best.
She dances pirouettes in limelight while onlookers lend their gaze to the most elegant of pagents
And the dance of her own death.
The sequins sparkle brightly amongst the illuminating light
The way her body flows its a wonder how we are all alive
To witness such a spectacle without a proper frame
A piece of art without the bounds of a four corner charade.
She falls to the floor to signal that her end is near
Who will throw roses to this angel in appreciation for the tears
While she was championing us with movement, as we are swelling with her pride
Her final dance, the darkest swan
The shadow of the broken night
Then her darkness washes over us
And the curtains cast us out to sea.
Leave it to the water
To wash the stains off our souls.
She was dead before she saw us
Throw a single rose.
To call her beauty simply magnificent would be an understated truth at best.
She dances pirouettes in limelight while onlookers lend their gaze to the most elegant of pagents
And the dance of her own death.
The sequins sparkle brightly amongst the illuminating light
The way her body flows its a wonder how we are all alive
To witness such a spectacle without a proper frame
A piece of art without the bounds of a four corner charade.
She falls to the floor to signal that her end is near
Who will throw roses to this angel in appreciation for the tears
While she was championing us with movement, as we are swelling with her pride
Her final dance, the darkest swan
The shadow of the broken night
Then her darkness washes over us
And the curtains cast us out to sea.
Leave it to the water
To wash the stains off our souls.
She was dead before she saw us
Throw a single rose.
The Feeling Fulfilled
The physical representation of blood escaping from my being
Lends volumes to the words that I can't speak
Consider the tongue, seared at the root
Match it to the way my lip quivers when I'm too full of fear
To utter a word against you.
All I ever wanted was for you to love me,
Not understanding why I would want to be held in the arms
Of someone responsible for beating me to ashes
Consider me ashes because every fire you extinguished it,
And every flower met your feet
Every dream, you turned nightmare
And warm feeling, winter cold.
I may be growing but the fact is I'm still trapped inside this cage
Afraid to dream at night for fear of seeing your evil face,
To call you a devil would be an insult to the name
You were ripped from the 8th layer and laid on earth to produce pain
I figured these bruises would settle whatever debt I owed you,
But you weren't satisfied with flesh, you had to inflict my mind too.
A demon, monster, coward, bastard, you go by many names.
I have cringed in corners waiting for the trauma to fade me away.
Lends volumes to the words that I can't speak
Consider the tongue, seared at the root
Match it to the way my lip quivers when I'm too full of fear
To utter a word against you.
All I ever wanted was for you to love me,
Not understanding why I would want to be held in the arms
Of someone responsible for beating me to ashes
Consider me ashes because every fire you extinguished it,
And every flower met your feet
Every dream, you turned nightmare
And warm feeling, winter cold.
I may be growing but the fact is I'm still trapped inside this cage
Afraid to dream at night for fear of seeing your evil face,
To call you a devil would be an insult to the name
You were ripped from the 8th layer and laid on earth to produce pain
I figured these bruises would settle whatever debt I owed you,
But you weren't satisfied with flesh, you had to inflict my mind too.
A demon, monster, coward, bastard, you go by many names.
I have cringed in corners waiting for the trauma to fade me away.
...And Then My Body Became A Stage
And I'm a mess and I'm a wreck,
But that would be an understatement at this point,
I came in like a lion but I'm leaving a lamb
Deteriorating failure
Like the loser I am.
I'll keep you all on the outside
Not inside of my brain
So you won't hear the frequencies
Of the things that it's saying
You're a mess you're a wreck
A failure of all things
You may have arrived as a lion
But you're leaving a cage
I will sleep on the dirtiest of hospital floors,
Just looking for a grave.
If I can't stop all your tears
What good am I?
Why do I belong here?
My spirit may be light
But heavy is this heart
I'll shut myself from light
So I can cry in the dark.
But that would be an understatement at this point,
I came in like a lion but I'm leaving a lamb
Deteriorating failure
Like the loser I am.
I'll keep you all on the outside
Not inside of my brain
So you won't hear the frequencies
Of the things that it's saying
You're a mess you're a wreck
A failure of all things
You may have arrived as a lion
But you're leaving a cage
I will sleep on the dirtiest of hospital floors,
Just looking for a grave.
If I can't stop all your tears
What good am I?
Why do I belong here?
My spirit may be light
But heavy is this heart
I'll shut myself from light
So I can cry in the dark.
I Speak In .WAV
I lack compression, no distortion to bitrate
My highs and lows are the peaks of the sound waves
While my frequencies vibrate,
I am nothing more than waveform,
Speaking in wavelengths and digital integration
I lack compression, I am the winner in your loudness war
I break the bass so that it rumbles louder than before.
I distort meanings into forms and shapes
Making the earth fall into my wake.
Speaking in wavelengths like before.
My open mouth is a constant source
The 1's and 0's are as clear as can be.
My mind is digital
And my thoughts are free.
My highs and lows are the peaks of the sound waves
While my frequencies vibrate,
I am nothing more than waveform,
Speaking in wavelengths and digital integration
I lack compression, I am the winner in your loudness war
I break the bass so that it rumbles louder than before.
I distort meanings into forms and shapes
Making the earth fall into my wake.
Speaking in wavelengths like before.
My open mouth is a constant source
The 1's and 0's are as clear as can be.
My mind is digital
And my thoughts are free.
Despite Popular Belief, My Tongue Is Red, Not Silver.
It seems a cheap focus to call out minor details here.
The way you broke like glass when the pressure became too much for you.
Well I'm still here holding up a world you left behind,
Standing with buckling knees on a concrete pedestal doused in flames.
I know that sometimes I need to be brought down off my high horse
But goddammit that horse is all I own.
You wouldn't trade me a penny for all these words
The silly metaphors and useless phrases I regurgitate to pass on a feeling.
I spent years building fences so my feelings would be good neighbors
and stay as far away from my mouth as they could.
I shoved them down so deep it caused an ache in my knees and a
Swelling that will never go away.
Now that I try to channel them here, I find out how hard I made it to feel at all.
It's hard to run from the truth on arthritic ankles, or a wounded knee,
with a broken back and bare feet.
Perhaps a lisp would makes these things a little more interesting to hear
To even my own ears.
I'd almost rather write in another language, just to feel like their were more words
To express the things I wanted to say.
I'm not uninspired, I'm just tired.
Tired of expecting too much from myself, like all these words are gonna make someone remember me.
So I keep writing them, in hopes that they will.
But who will ever read them?
How will they ever make it any further than this page?
Now that I try to channel them here, I find out how hard I made it to feel at all.
It's hard to run from the truth on arthritic ankles, or a wounded knee,
with a broken back and bare feet.
Perhaps a lisp would makes these things a little more interesting to hear
To even my own ears.
I'd almost rather write in another language, just to feel like their were more words
To express the things I wanted to say.
I'm not uninspired, I'm just tired.
Tired of expecting too much from myself, like all these words are gonna make someone remember me.
So I keep writing them, in hopes that they will.
But who will ever read them?
How will they ever make it any further than this page?
It Was Dark..
She never felt the passion like this.
And they never touched this way
But it was just how they wanted it.
Quieter than a heartbeat.
The look he threw into her eyes was priceless
The glance she gave him, the same.
They knew the consequences and what others would say
The grip of her on his back was more than he could bear
The nails clawing into skin so beautifully
She held the touch of fire in her hands.
Then the blood, oh the blood
She began to exsanguinate
The pieces of flesh, she tore away.
She swallowed all of his innocence before she tore the heart from his chest.
Morning growing in the graveyard
The missing body, the tangled mess.
They’ll find him hidden deep in the hedgerow
And she’s nowhere to be found.
A Dead Man Will Not Attend Your Dinner Banquet
Head under metaphorical water, because I'm not truly drowning
But I want you to believe that I'm suffocating in a pool consisting
Of everything from the afterbirth to the liner of my coffin.
Synapse will cease to fire when the room goes quiet.
Because even my nervous system wants to hear the intricacies
Of every world formed from the mouth of someone like you.
But I want you to believe that I'm suffocating in a pool consisting
Of everything from the afterbirth to the liner of my coffin.
Synapse will cease to fire when the room goes quiet.
Because even my nervous system wants to hear the intricacies
Of every world formed from the mouth of someone like you.
I Jump To Conclusions Like It Was Fucking Hopscotch
We gave up fighting for this cause too long ago
Hanging our heads, trudging through the cold and the snow.
The handshakes that sealed the deals for us
As blood red as the killers we had grown to trust.
We all arrived too late for the gun fight...
Throwing in knives, a last ditch effort for sanity
The cry of our own humanity stifled by
The deaths of our sons and our daughters
We sent them to the ocean just to die in the waters.
So tell me where do the children go?
Tell me what have we done?
We sent the shiver and the tingle to your spine
Watching the horror unfold as we prepared you to die.
It's not the first time destruction was set in our minds.
If you call this a life, I call it a lie.
Hanging our heads, trudging through the cold and the snow.
The handshakes that sealed the deals for us
As blood red as the killers we had grown to trust.
We all arrived too late for the gun fight...
Throwing in knives, a last ditch effort for sanity
The cry of our own humanity stifled by
The deaths of our sons and our daughters
We sent them to the ocean just to die in the waters.
So tell me where do the children go?
Tell me what have we done?
We sent the shiver and the tingle to your spine
Watching the horror unfold as we prepared you to die.
It's not the first time destruction was set in our minds.
If you call this a life, I call it a lie.
The Kraken Speaks Through Me.....
Run through the hills of North Carolina
And without a doubt you will find
That there is ample reason to leave me to my own devices
My own creatures of habit and turns of phrase
Oh call me a twisted wreck of a shell of a man.
And I'll just point out how you can't look away.
Flee to the ponds in England.
Give their royality your vicious ways.
Your unfit mothers will come calling "bastard".
While they hold their hands out for change.
Or dance inside their burlesque homes,
to make the means to eat.
And I will break my knuckles
in the muck below the banks of the River Jordan.
Crying about how this is the place where miracles are meant to be.
But yet I see no magic before my eyes, and nothing but water before me.
I've felt the trap of an infinite passion for years now.
Long before the twinkle in your eyes led me to believe that
The love that I had given up searching for was still there
And still existed.
And no matter how many times I break skin to let blood drip down to the floor
There will never be anything as scarlet red as the flush in my cheeks the first time
That you told me you loved me.
Oh how the miracles of men get swept under the rug by those who divide our nations with their hatred
and undeniable stupidity.
God, I could rant forever about how the masses are being spoonfed, and to wake up, we must drag the spoon from out their mouth, and leave them be until they're starving, and begging for more.
But that's the job of the poets before me, to hope for the change that I need to make within the world,
To make within myself.
I may only be one man, but by the time I am dead, more than you will know me.
I will be rewritten into your history books, whether people think me a stain on beautiful white sheets.
Or just another poet spewing his useless words from his outstretched hands
trying to make everyone see that life was beautiful, when never really believing it himself.
I've seen the devil, but it is no immortal being, not the one shoved into our eyelids, blazed into our lungs.
The devil is within us all, turning and looking the other way rather than stopping to make a change.
I was the devil.
I was the devil every time I let him lay his hands on her and did nothing.
Looked away and pretending like it was never happening.
I am the devil
You are the devil.
But we can exorcise that demon once and for all if we just try.
Oh God just try.
I regret never saying this sooner.
And without a doubt you will find
That there is ample reason to leave me to my own devices
My own creatures of habit and turns of phrase
Oh call me a twisted wreck of a shell of a man.
And I'll just point out how you can't look away.
Flee to the ponds in England.
Give their royality your vicious ways.
Your unfit mothers will come calling "bastard".
While they hold their hands out for change.
Or dance inside their burlesque homes,
to make the means to eat.
And I will break my knuckles
in the muck below the banks of the River Jordan.
Crying about how this is the place where miracles are meant to be.
But yet I see no magic before my eyes, and nothing but water before me.
I've felt the trap of an infinite passion for years now.
Long before the twinkle in your eyes led me to believe that
The love that I had given up searching for was still there
And still existed.
And no matter how many times I break skin to let blood drip down to the floor
There will never be anything as scarlet red as the flush in my cheeks the first time
That you told me you loved me.
Oh how the miracles of men get swept under the rug by those who divide our nations with their hatred
and undeniable stupidity.
God, I could rant forever about how the masses are being spoonfed, and to wake up, we must drag the spoon from out their mouth, and leave them be until they're starving, and begging for more.
But that's the job of the poets before me, to hope for the change that I need to make within the world,
To make within myself.
I may only be one man, but by the time I am dead, more than you will know me.
I will be rewritten into your history books, whether people think me a stain on beautiful white sheets.
Or just another poet spewing his useless words from his outstretched hands
trying to make everyone see that life was beautiful, when never really believing it himself.
I've seen the devil, but it is no immortal being, not the one shoved into our eyelids, blazed into our lungs.
The devil is within us all, turning and looking the other way rather than stopping to make a change.
I was the devil.
I was the devil every time I let him lay his hands on her and did nothing.
Looked away and pretending like it was never happening.
I am the devil
You are the devil.
But we can exorcise that demon once and for all if we just try.
Oh God just try.
I regret never saying this sooner.
Is The Best I Can Do, Good Enough?
Another midnight drown the drain again.
Perhaps another night that I'm just truly dying in.
Maybe just dying to
Call you on the phone
Tell you that I love you.
Or maybe just waste away.
I'll walk a thin line. Maybe it's better that way
Get past the red tape. Taking precautions was never my thing.
Maybe I'm just too cautious to
Spill how I feel right to your face.
I hope you can sense it in your bones.
Before I waste away.
Someday I won't be a coward and I'll call you.
Drip words the phone so elegant and sweet.
You'll finally understand all of my being
It belongs to the two of you, and I don't.
I just don't want to waste away.
Call it another midnight down the drain.
When I See My Mother Cry...
I don't want the red eye swell before a downpour
The last thing I ever want is to see that pain
When I see my mother cry.
I want to be there to stop the rain.
When it's my fault my mother cries.
I feel like less than a human being
Causing grief in someone else just isn't my way.
When it's the worlds fault my mother cries.
I want to build bricks walls incapable of collapsing
Around her fragile heart just so she will be protected.
When a dark clouds looms atop her head
All I want to do is breakthrough to the sky.
To cause a sunshine so bright.
She can't help but feel alive.
When I see my mother cry..
It breaks my heart.
The last thing I ever want is to see that pain
When I see my mother cry.
I want to be there to stop the rain.
When it's my fault my mother cries.
I feel like less than a human being
Causing grief in someone else just isn't my way.
When it's the worlds fault my mother cries.
I want to build bricks walls incapable of collapsing
Around her fragile heart just so she will be protected.
When a dark clouds looms atop her head
All I want to do is breakthrough to the sky.
To cause a sunshine so bright.
She can't help but feel alive.
When I see my mother cry..
It breaks my heart.
A Regretful Handful Full of Medication
Another dose will pull the tears back this time.
But you can't be afraid to feel your whole life.
We've come so far away for this to get us.
I've got to know that you'll trust me this time.
Why are you so convinced that I'll fail?
Where did your trust go, and how can I find it.
Why are you so sure this won't work?
The blueprints seem beautiful, the architecture laid.
You've laid eyes upon the groundwork, don't sabotage the frame.
Oh, your handful of little capsules may pull you away from reality now.
But I'm still here knocking at your glass case with a hammer, waiting for something to give.
My resolve to reach you is infinite.
and I'm tired of gritting my fucking teeth.
I'm biting my tongue so hard, blood is pouring from my mouth.
Mix it with the venom of my words, and to hell it shall amount.
You're not him, you never will be.
There's no reason to keep the world on hold
No reason to stop an emotional flood from breaking down the dam
Just talk to me.
We'll be alright.
Just let me know you need me.
I'll be just fine.
The world isn't yours to care for.
We're all alright.
Take a burden off your shoulders
Before the weight breaks your back in time.
But you can't be afraid to feel your whole life.
We've come so far away for this to get us.
I've got to know that you'll trust me this time.
Why are you so convinced that I'll fail?
Where did your trust go, and how can I find it.
Why are you so sure this won't work?
The blueprints seem beautiful, the architecture laid.
You've laid eyes upon the groundwork, don't sabotage the frame.
Oh, your handful of little capsules may pull you away from reality now.
But I'm still here knocking at your glass case with a hammer, waiting for something to give.
My resolve to reach you is infinite.
and I'm tired of gritting my fucking teeth.
I'm biting my tongue so hard, blood is pouring from my mouth.
Mix it with the venom of my words, and to hell it shall amount.
You're not him, you never will be.
There's no reason to keep the world on hold
No reason to stop an emotional flood from breaking down the dam
Just talk to me.
We'll be alright.
Just let me know you need me.
I'll be just fine.
The world isn't yours to care for.
We're all alright.
Take a burden off your shoulders
Before the weight breaks your back in time.
Spilling An Ink Well...
Pen to parchment, and ink like black smoke.
I’ll reverse its terror into my lungs
Before I call you on the phone
Scream out and list the reason I never won the war.
It’s a vile dusk that I just can't shake
Waiting for you.
The blood red metaphors that pull my words back
Into that abyss every time I try to rupture their chains.
The shaking syndrome of my mouth and hands
Some will call it a malady
But it's the nerves that I have built
Built a wall of them for you to see
Like a lightning strike to a building of synapse
Isn't thought a beautiful thing.
I'll pretend I'm waiting for you.
When really you're all just waiting for me.
These clouds lose their silver linings and become nothing more
Than ink blots in the sky bringing a rain to drown me in.
Forcing me to dig into this mud just to find the book of life
So I can break back these clouds and bring the sun again.
I’ll reverse its terror into my lungs
Before I call you on the phone
Scream out and list the reason I never won the war.
It’s a vile dusk that I just can't shake
Waiting for you.
The blood red metaphors that pull my words back
Into that abyss every time I try to rupture their chains.
The shaking syndrome of my mouth and hands
Some will call it a malady
But it's the nerves that I have built
Built a wall of them for you to see
Like a lightning strike to a building of synapse
Isn't thought a beautiful thing.
I'll pretend I'm waiting for you.
When really you're all just waiting for me.
These clouds lose their silver linings and become nothing more
Than ink blots in the sky bringing a rain to drown me in.
Forcing me to dig into this mud just to find the book of life
So I can break back these clouds and bring the sun again.
Holding Everything I Own In Your Filthy Hands
These skeletons are real.
Save the flesh and pity for me.
The fiends will walk the streets of Paris
Stealing life before it has a chance to be.
From the turnstyles to the heart-attacks
The subway to the skin of our knees
Where we fall and scrape to bone in the ending.
So save the flesh and the pity for me.
You can take a millions miles out of me and you'll find
The road I've traveled isnt much different from that of the ocean.
I can start to drown here or there, it doesnt really matter to me.
As long as when I wash up on the shore
You're right along the water, waiting to try and help me to breathe.
So push the skeletons out of their coffins
Just like you push the water out of my lungs,
Save the flesh and I wash the blood off of your white dress
And brush the dirt from your knees.
Save the flesh and pity for me.
The fiends will walk the streets of Paris
Stealing life before it has a chance to be.
From the turnstyles to the heart-attacks
The subway to the skin of our knees
Where we fall and scrape to bone in the ending.
So save the flesh and the pity for me.
You can take a millions miles out of me and you'll find
The road I've traveled isnt much different from that of the ocean.
I can start to drown here or there, it doesnt really matter to me.
As long as when I wash up on the shore
You're right along the water, waiting to try and help me to breathe.
So push the skeletons out of their coffins
Just like you push the water out of my lungs,
Save the flesh and I wash the blood off of your white dress
And brush the dirt from your knees.
Patient Operandi
I can't look back, white linoleum,
I've got these needles in my skin, I can feel it coursing
Running through my veins and it burns
One more dose of medicine, another to the hearse.
Now you gotta tell me what to do.
Because I've made up my mind that I am over you.
I got my hospital gown draggin' the floor
The IV in my neck is all I'm living for.
Just another dose of drugs to kick the pain
Just another dose of drugs to send it all away.
Baby, tell me that the fates, they aren't so cruel
To leave me inside these walls where the dead will rule
If you go, you might just turn back much too late.
I'll be hanging from the ceiling
Choking on the tongue that sealed my fate.
It's too late to turn back, we got a smoking gun
So keep running away baby, oh that's all you've ever known
I'll be hanging from the rafters if I just can't let you go.
I never been a strong one, and you never followed suit.
So run away darling, if that's all you know how to do.
I've got these needles in my skin, I can feel it coursing
Running through my veins and it burns
One more dose of medicine, another to the hearse.
Now you gotta tell me what to do.
Because I've made up my mind that I am over you.
I got my hospital gown draggin' the floor
The IV in my neck is all I'm living for.
Just another dose of drugs to kick the pain
Just another dose of drugs to send it all away.
Baby, tell me that the fates, they aren't so cruel
To leave me inside these walls where the dead will rule
If you go, you might just turn back much too late.
I'll be hanging from the ceiling
Choking on the tongue that sealed my fate.
It's too late to turn back, we got a smoking gun
So keep running away baby, oh that's all you've ever known
I'll be hanging from the rafters if I just can't let you go.
I never been a strong one, and you never followed suit.
So run away darling, if that's all you know how to do.
Fall Short Syndrome
If I could feel this way
I'd feel this way forever towards you
If I could make my mouth just match my heart
I'd take you over.
Make my name on your lips
The word you're speaking
When you're dreaming.
But I'm not quite the poet
I need to be to make you love me.
I make excuses for myself because I know I'll never be
Exactly what I wanted to be, which is more than I am now
But yet still less than you're deserving.
I fall short of the protagonist
The hero of your comic book
The never-ending heart.
If I could stop the rain
I'd stop these tears from falling on you.
If I was younger now
I'd be the boy who always loves you.
But I can't work the magic needed
To reverse the things I need
To make sure that your whole life
Wasn't full of hurt and constant grief
I pull excuses from the bottom of my barrel of tricks
My smoke and mirrors faded long before the final scene.
I disappoint more than I should, but I swear that I do try
I'm just not sure I'll ever be the catch that you deserve and
I am sorry, please forgive me.
But I swear that I'll fucking try.
I'd feel this way forever towards you
If I could make my mouth just match my heart
I'd take you over.
Make my name on your lips
The word you're speaking
When you're dreaming.
But I'm not quite the poet
I need to be to make you love me.
I make excuses for myself because I know I'll never be
Exactly what I wanted to be, which is more than I am now
But yet still less than you're deserving.
I fall short of the protagonist
The hero of your comic book
The never-ending heart.
If I could stop the rain
I'd stop these tears from falling on you.
If I was younger now
I'd be the boy who always loves you.
But I can't work the magic needed
To reverse the things I need
To make sure that your whole life
Wasn't full of hurt and constant grief
I pull excuses from the bottom of my barrel of tricks
My smoke and mirrors faded long before the final scene.
I disappoint more than I should, but I swear that I do try
I'm just not sure I'll ever be the catch that you deserve and
I am sorry, please forgive me.
But I swear that I'll fucking try.
I make excuses for myself because I know I'll never be
Exactly what I wanted to be, which is more than I am now
But yet still less than you're deserving.
I fall short of the protagonist
The hero of your comic book
The never-ending heart.
The Rain Isn't Coming....Enjoy Your Drought
There was a venom in my mouth,
yes, there was heartache in these lungs
When I cursed your house the plagues
That originate from my tongue
I was a beast of many colors
Like a jackal in my head
I regret the voice of darkness
That spewed forth from 'neath my chest
And it's just another mistake on the list of things I never do right
An epiphany that makes the scars return and then I'm lost
Then I flooded what was once my rotten head
With a goodness that I felt
I was on the edge of breaking
Before it pulled me back to health
The sweet rhythms in my ears
Yes, the noises heard so clear
That replaced my venom with soil
Where flowers grow their children
And its just not like me to do this, I make no emotions for myself
But I learn that sometimes things cannot be placed back on a shelf
Encircled by a need that I
I really like to cry too.
yes, there was heartache in these lungs
When I cursed your house the plagues
That originate from my tongue
I was a beast of many colors
Like a jackal in my head
I regret the voice of darkness
That spewed forth from 'neath my chest
And it's just another mistake on the list of things I never do right
An epiphany that makes the scars return and then I'm lost
Then I flooded what was once my rotten head
With a goodness that I felt
I was on the edge of breaking
Before it pulled me back to health
The sweet rhythms in my ears
Yes, the noises heard so clear
That replaced my venom with soil
Where flowers grow their children
And its just not like me to do this, I make no emotions for myself
But I learn that sometimes things cannot be placed back on a shelf
Encircled by a need that I
I really like to cry too.
Handsome Daggers
The windows of your open soul are no longer for us to see through
You sprayed them with black paint to keep anyone from really seeing you
Stop cutting out your tongue, one of these days it just won't grow back
and you'll never speak another word or sing to me again.
Stop polluting yourself,
These handsome daggers won't stab any deeper
We won't be killing ourselves.
Darling, it's okay to bleed.
The microphone explodes as you spew your explanations
Not a disease, it's a cure, for the ragged infatuations
Stop cutting out your tongue, we need to hear you speak
In the end of the earth, I want you singing song to me.
Stop destroying yourself,
These handsome daggers belong in gentlemen's hands.
No more wasting ourselves.
Darling, it's okay to breathe.
Not saving ourselves,
Its a bad habit, I fear that you learned from me.
Off with the heads of our enemies
Darling, it's okay to grieve.
Its okay with me.
You sprayed them with black paint to keep anyone from really seeing you
Stop cutting out your tongue, one of these days it just won't grow back
and you'll never speak another word or sing to me again.
Stop polluting yourself,
These handsome daggers won't stab any deeper
We won't be killing ourselves.
Darling, it's okay to bleed.
The microphone explodes as you spew your explanations
Not a disease, it's a cure, for the ragged infatuations
Stop cutting out your tongue, we need to hear you speak
In the end of the earth, I want you singing song to me.
Stop destroying yourself,
These handsome daggers belong in gentlemen's hands.
No more wasting ourselves.
Darling, it's okay to breathe.
Not saving ourselves,
Its a bad habit, I fear that you learned from me.
Off with the heads of our enemies
Darling, it's okay to grieve.
Its okay with me.
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